First Time
by Faolain
Summary: There are many first times in life that pass people by completely unnoticed. Post AC


**First Time**

Gentle, yet firm and steady female hands were working on the button of his shirt again, undressing him. By now it was routine, she would undress him, wash him, work on his wounds and then leave him be for 10 minutes so he had time to wash his privates himself, then she would return, dress him in fresh clothes and retire for the night.

He stared at her, she avoided his eyes, like always. Her gaze was focused on the sleeves of his shirt. Maybe she didn't do it on purpose, maybe she just didn't notice or didn't care that he stared at her so bluntly. Maybe she just didn't give a damn about anything and ignored him completely, just doing what she was supposed to do.

And hell, if she knew that he always got a hard on when her petite hands worked its way up and down his body coming so achingly close to a part she would never touch when she left him in nothing than his boxers he probably would be a very dead man. Or maybe she knew and didn't give a damn about it as well. He always had to take care of 'that problem' when she left for his 10 minutes of privacy.

The Geostigma was cured but most part of his body was still malfunctioning because the aftereffects would last for quite a while. Breathing was hard, and moving was hard as well, especially after his little show with Jenova's head and the remains of a skyscraper. Without the ability to use healing materia on him (Geostigma made people immune to that), his body was improving slowly, so why on earth was THAT particular part of him working itself into overdrive every evening now!?

He always felt ashamed for it.

She never said anything aside from necessities nor did she smile or look him in the eye. Her expression is blank, the perfect pokerface, not giving a single thought away. Gone was the talkative, eager woman and gone was that spark in her eyes that had made it worth to tease her about things a bit.

She never blushed, laughed, sighed, complained or talked unless spoken to. He terribly missed _her. _Her old self that was so full of life, blushed an awfully lot, maintained nervous habits like biting on her lower lip, dropping various things occasionally, running into walls (he could swear she did!) and giving away company secrets by accident... She never did it now. Well, there wasn't any company which secrets she could spill now but they were things to talk about. Lot's of things! And she was just awfully silent.

The final battle with the Weapons in Midgar had affected her, but she still was quite 'normal' after that. The big blow had happened when the three silver haired devils held her and Tseng hostage for a while.

They returned in almost one piece but one could never tell how much mental damage the bastards had done to his Turks or how much of the physical damage was kept secret from him.

He traced her frame with his eyes, wondering if she had scars underneath her neat black suit. His "other mind" craved to know. Her weight shifted on the side of his bed, a sign that she was about to leave. He couldn't stop himself from snatching her wrist with a strength he didn't know he was able to draw out of his body as she got up and turned around.

"Elena..."

Her emotionless brown eyes stared into pleading blue ones, trying to hide that she was puzzled by his sudden show of action.

"Sir?" Pause. The silence was uncomfortable, he could hear his own heart beating and the air seemed to be so thick that one would have been able to cut through it with a knife. She looked at his hand that still held her thin wrist in a tight grip.

"Is there anything else you need?"

"Yes." His voice was hoarse from the lack of usage. "There is."

Her mouth opened to reply but before she was able to make a sound she was pulled down with a force that shocked her, within seconds she was pinned underneath him on his bed, his lips were on hers and his tongue gliding into her mouth, muffling any sound of protest. One of his large hands was in her soft hair, caressing her scalp, the other was with quick movement under her jacket and blouse, roaming up and down from her waist to her breasts, finding a way to touch the warm skin that was concealed by her bra.

He deepened the kiss, making sure he was kissing her thoroughly while the hand that had touched her breasts moments ago wandered between her thighs, touching her there desperately despite the fact that she was still fully dressed. He broke the fierce kiss as he needed some air and looked at her.

After all this time, there was emotion in her eyes. Fear. Fright. Sadness. And he could tell that she had resigned, she wouldn't fight him. He felt guilt creeping up his spine and a knot forming in his stomach. It had finally happened – he had lost his well maintained control. Looking at her eyes he realized that he would have probably raped and had his way with the only person that cared enough about him to bring him food three times a day and bother with everything else concerning him and his health. The only person that ever sat by his side by free will when he was feeling shitwrecked through and through without consuming alcohol or drugs.

He stared at her honey colored eyes, trying to say what was on his mind.

"Elena... I-I'm... I don't..." Then he started to laugh. The sound was shallow, somehow it frightened himself.

What frightened him the most was the foreign feeling in his eyes. At first it was a little nagging burn at the corners but it increased rapidly until the sight before his eyes became blurry.

"...pathetic... aren't I?"

He thought he was going to lose it. His company – his life - was history, his health as well and would be for quite a while, maybe forever and now he was close to abusing what he probably could call a friend.

After years and years of maintaining the reputation of not crying or bleeding the image of himself was gone completely. He had bled after the battle and many times after that. And now, after all those years Rufus Shinra cried for the first time in his life.

There was pause that seemed to last for hours until he felt movement under him.

"You're not." One of the tender hands he knew so well touched his cheek, wiping away one of the tears that silently made their way down to meet their fate.

"You are just human."

Her arms found their way around his neck and he was pulled down into a hug. The first hug he'd ever gotten in his life. His final barrier was broken and he started to sob into her soft blonde hair until he fell asleep.

And that's how Reno, Rude and Tseng found them, when they returned from their little drinking tour in the middle of the night.

Rufus, only dressed in his white boxers was possessively spooning a half dressed ruffled Elena on his bed, even in their sleep it was clear that this was his woman and no other man was allowed to touch anything of his.

Reno looked at Tseng and grinned, a malicious spark in his eyes.

"Too bad for ya man, that you've just decided to make a move on the gal. Told ya years ago not to wait too long. Chance missed, buddy!"

Rude silently closed the bedroom door that had been suspiciously ajar when they had entered Healin Lodge.

"You know Reno," the wutaian man started, "maybe you were right on this one."

"Whoa really!?"

"There's a first time for everything, you know?"

* * *

**A/N: Hope you enjoyed this one, the idea struck me in the middle of the night and I couldn't get it out of my head for a while. Reviews would be nice, let me know what you think :)**


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